So this might be lengthy or some unnecessary information but I'll go through everything to make sure any help is not relying too much on guessing.

About two weeks ago I suddenly heard my mini sound like hell. It was rattling like crazy. I actually though maybe a heat shield fell loose or I snagged and piece of a can or something. Anyway I listened to it, not knowing of the death rattle situation. I thought it sounds like I suddenly had the worst valve lash on the planet. I parked it for a few hours and when I got back in I'd hoped it would have just went away. Well, it was still just as bad. I drove six miles home and it was running like hell, stalling at lights if I didn't hold the brake and slightly depress the accelerator to keep the rpms up. I got home, did some research, learned of death rattle and said that has to be it.

The next day after work I disconnected the battery and opened the valve cover and thought well that top guide bracket is clearly missing its plastic guide. Something looked funny so I looked closer and thought why is there no clearance between the cam sprockets and that bracket. So I touched it and learned that the bracket had sheared clean off at its base.

I ordered the timing chain kit and the tool kit from reputable sites the next day. Last weekend I locked in the crank with the supplied pin. Then I locked down the cam shafts into the proper positions. I began systematically removing things and labeled every thing. I got everything apart, not without a run to the store to deal with the external torx. I began putting everything back together. I torqued everything down to the proper specs as I went along. I triple checked that every sensor was reconnected and the every bolt was in and that everything had gone in the same as it looked it the pictures I took of everything when I started. Time to start it and I got "click" and then warning lights like crazy. I was shown a gear, then a gear with an "!" And then just "!" Then a bunch of lights on the dash light up. I tried it again and same result.

I came on this site in a thread about the timing chain job in general and asked about this. Someone said check your battery which I over looked as it seemed too simple. So I tossed my battery charger on it and I charged it up. Tried to start it again and nothing a few more times even when I turned the charger to jump start mode. Now purely out of frustration I held the button on the side of the turn signal lever and the two on the telling why I simultaneously said I f-n hate you to my mini. Well my mini responded with information that means nothing to me except that I should take pictures of what it was showing me.

I'm hoping that with the knowledge of the people on this site I can continue to avoid the stdealerships

 

These are in no particular order it's just the way I captured them

 

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You entered Service Mode and it is showing the related information. I think all that info is limited to the KOMBI (i.e. the instrument panel). Not necessarily related to the problems you are having. You can access the same information by holding the 0.0 button pressed on a fully-functioning car.

 

Ok I didn't know if the part number was relevant at all. It seems I may need to bring it to my family mechanic to get this problem solved.